I catch myself as I write these words and berate my self indulgence as if being 4 stone heavier than I was in January even matters. My mother is four stone lighter than she was is January but that is because she is dying... My Second Cousin graduated University this week without his Father there … Continue reading How pathetic is all this weightloss bull shit?
So I didn't go to the Burlex class the week after, nor the week after that.... not this week either. My friend Sarah has been an absolute bloody trooper and has been every week. I don't even have the excuse that my friend didn't go so I didn't want to either! I genuinely loved the … Continue reading Lack of motivation strikes again…
I am putting on weight. Since having my band loosened at accident and emergency recently, I have been able to eat pretty much what I want and have only thrown up twice, which is, if you know me, extremely rare. It is a strange juxtaposition. The happiness eating again brings, tinged with the fear of … Continue reading Body Positivity, Please Don’t Dessert Me.
As I stare into the toilet bowl, retching for perhaps the fifthtieth time today, I wonder if all this is worth it. It is 2012, I had my gastric band fitted on the 30th of December 2011. What's annoying about a gastric band is it doesn't just work straight away and, if you're anything like … Continue reading The Vomit Chronicles.
Looking at the above picture you probably wouldn’t guess the effort, the anguish, the physical hardships it has taken to get to look semi-healthy (well in the eyes of a brain washed world anyway) but I question my decision to have my first Gastric Band and even more so the revisional surgery, which stitched it … Continue reading Gastric Banding…is it worth it?
It is 1997, a hot Summer, I am ten years old. Our Mum and Dad have just told us, their four children, that they are getting a divorce. We are sitting in a restaurant named ‘Fatty Arbuckles’ (funny and foreshadowing really given what was to happen in later years.) Divorce, at that moment, didn’t seem … Continue reading Hey Fatty Bum Bum! Confessions of a Gastric Band Patient.